Topeka

We have arrived!  So far we have made a lot of progress, but still have many boxes to unpack.  Jonny started school last week and has been very busy.  Jacob and I have been hanging out at the house and trying to be productive.  It is virtually impossible to do things while he is awake, because he likes to "help" so much.  He is loving all the boxes (to climb on) and tape (to stick everywhere) and stairs (to throw things down/attempt to slide down).  He is really excited about animals right now.  He likes all kinds, although he is particular to "pish" (fish) and "wino" (rhino) and "ippo" (hippo).  He's also been interested in doing puzzles lately.  It seems like just overnight he learned how to do those.  Other things Jacob loves right now:  picking out his own snack (fruit snacks are #1 if given that option), reading books, watching Finding Nemo (which he calls "Dora" which means Dory), throwing things, giving kisses, telling mom and dad what to do, going down slides, being outside, taking the dogs for a walk, dumping food in the dog bowls, and taking 3 stuffed animals to bed every night ("bo" which is bear, Elmo, and "Ruff" his dog.) 

I just wanted to give a small update for now.  Oh, and I found a Zumba class to go to here in Topeka.  I went tonight and it was a lot of fun.  Zumba is awesome!

Happy Father's Day!!

Jacob has some pretty big shoes to fill!  Lately Jacob has been obsessed with trying on Jonny's and my shoes.

This past weekend we went to Shreveport so Jonny could take his GMAT test.  He did very well, and we had a great weekend.  We swam in the hotel pool, went shopping, and watched Jacob open and close all the doors in the hotel room over and over again.  We stayed at the Residence Inn by Marriott, and it was well worth it.  Let me tell you, having a separete room to put the baby to sleep, especially one like Jacob, is heaven.  By the way, am I still allowed to call him a "baby"?  I guess regardless of what you say, I still will. 

We celebrated Father's Day on Sunday, and it was great.  Jacob is lucky to have such a great dad.  And I am lucky to have a husband who is such a great father.  We are so glad he is home!



Louisiana

Jonny's home!!!  He arrived home on May 25th around noon.  Since then we have been staying in temporary lodging on post.  I have lost count of the number of bugs we have found since arriving.  Cockroaches, spiders, millipedes, ants, and lots that I don't even know the names for. 

It has been awesome having Jonny home!  We have been able to spend a lot of family time together, going to the park, swimming, visiting Gone Wild Safari, and much more. 

Since arriving, not only has my phone bit the dust, but also my computer.  I can't say I am too surprised considering Jacob has thrown my phone in the bath and dropped it several times, and he has dumped a whole cup of water on my computer among other things.  It is so weird to not have a phone...or phone numbers for that matter.

As we speak, Jacob is trying to climb all over me and punch keys on the Jonny's computer.  It is amazing I have typed as much as I have.  So that's all for now.  I will try to do better about updating.

Long Time No Blog

Well, I am waiting awfully late at night to be updating my blog.  But like Nike says, Just Do It!  I mean, we are pushing 9:30 folks!  I am a 10 o'clock bed timer and haven't even gotten my PJs on yet.  Yikes!

So lately, what's been going on?  Well, Jacob and I have just been enjoying our time together.  He is laughing a lot now, which is fun, and hitting me with random items in the face, which is not fun.  Is he learning the difference between what hurts and doesn't?  I don't think so.  We are still working on that.  Yesterday, I said "nice" and I used his hand to gently stroke my cheek.  We did this a couple of times, and I also did it to him.  So today when I got home from work, we were playing, and he hit me in the face.  Then I said "ouch, be nice" and he stroked my cheek, then hit me one more time.  This is just like anything I am teaching him lately: one step forward and two steps back.  Tonight we got in a wrestling match as I was trying to put on his diaper and pajamas.  He reminds me very much of an alligator with all of his twisting and turning.  He's quite crafty.  At the end I feel the urge to throw my hand in the air as if I just roped a calf and say "time."  This makes me miss Jarod Allen playing for the Chiefs.  Sigh.

He is also starting to converse more, which is fun.  He says mama, dada, papa (grandpa), more, bye bye, night night, ball, but his absolute favorite word right now is "Aisha."  And he says it plain as day.  He just walks around the house saying, "Aisha, Aisha, Aisha, Aisha."  He also has taken to saying his baby sitter's name a lot which is Darla "Dala."  He signs more, all done, milk, eat, drink.  When you say "love you" he automatically blows you a kiss.  He also says a LOT of indiscriminate things.  He multi-tasks by talking on two cell phones at once, then in the middle of his convo, he will hold both phones up to your ears and expect you to have a conversation.  I mean this kid not only expects attention, he demands it!

My sister is coming in town this weekend, and I am very excited to see her!  On another positive note, I took Montana for a run tonight for the first time in a while and I think he enjoyed it.  I left Gracie at home, but I think she's okay with that.  When I take the dogs and Jacob for a walk, 90% of the time she jumps in the bottom of the stroller and just rides.  She could care less about actually walking.  Can we say princess?  Montana is by far the best dog I have ever had.  I would recommend him to anyone!  Gracie randomly pees inside (although she's shown improvement over the last few months) and seems to be a little ADHD.  She will never just sit in your lap.  And if she gets remotely close to your face, keep your mouth closed.  She is definitely a licker.  Love her still though.

Jacob and I are looking forward to Jonny returning!  Soon soon soon!!

The Real Truth

I am tired.  Physically tired.  But all I can think about is blogging.  This whole day really put into my mind the need for blogification (the need to release inner thoughts by blogging.).  It will most likely be negative, and thus, a warning is appropriate. If you are one of those people who feel that reading negative things brings you down, then just hit "next blog" at the top of the page and see where that takes you.  If you are someone who finds humor in negativity, read on.  I am giving you permission to laugh at my negativity.  Negativity is my sense of humor.

To really set this up, we must travel back in time a few days.  I think Tuesday would be a good place to start.....

In order to make up for not working last week, I decided to work 3 days instead of 2, Tues., Weds, Thurs.  I take Jacob to the sitter, and I drive the hour or so drive to Lindsborg to try and inspire middle and high school students.  As we started out the week, it was apparent first of all that Jacob had a runny nose and a little cough.  These both progressed as the week went on, but still nothing to be too concerned about.  I too started feeling more sick as the week progressed.  By Thursday I wasn't even sure I wanted to go to work.  I was feeling achy all over, hot and cold, hot and cold, sore throat, congestion, cough.  And Jacob pretty much sounded like he was barking at this point.  But no fevers.  So I trudged on, thinking, quitters never win, and winners never quit.  You know what I should have been thinking?  Losers go to work when they are sick.  Period.  End of story.

So....Jacob had a "wellness check" on Friday morning, that I ended up being so thankful for.  I could tell that day he felt much worse, because his eyes were tired, and he actually wanted to sit on my lap.  That is how I know Jacob is really sick.  If he just wants to sit, there is something wrong.  He even fell asleep on my lap without me rocking him.  Never happened before.  Well, turns out he had an ear infection.  Awesome.  That would explain waking at night.  I happened to ask the doc if he could look in my throat and tell me if I needed to get tested for strep throat, and he said yes.  Double awesome.  So I ended up with an appt for me as well, but the strep test came back negative.  The nurse practitioner seemed confused.  She was just sure it was going to come back positive.  But oh well, have some penicillin anyways.  So both Jacob and I, at the end of the day, ended up with some sort of "cillin" medicine. 

This is what I want to know: why do Jacob and I have to be sick at the same time?  It is really hard to take care of a sick kid when you are sick as well.  In fact, I would say, you don't really "get" to be sick.  Remember when you were a kid?  And your mom let you lay on the couch drinking 7up and watching any movie you wanted?  HA  That is for the weak.  There is no time off with a baby, or a kid, or kids.  You are a workhorse built for nose-wiping, diaper-changing, consoling, lifting, feeding, cleaning, etc. etc. etc.

That brings me to today, the first full day of meds for both Jacob and I.  If I didn't have my trusty list, I wouldn't have a clue whether I took penicillin at 4 in the morning, or my women's multivitamin.  I also wouldn't know if I gave Jacob his ibuprofen or his bath.  I am literally that tired.  Oh it takes me back.  Back to the days of having a newborn and getting no sleep.  Something about interrupted sleep and your body being drained just puts you in a haze.  Today was probably not as bad as it could have been, considering both Jacob and I feel like crud.  But, I will say, it was horrible.  And here is where the ugly truth comes in.  Positivity seekers, skip this next part. 

Jacob is a very difficult child.  Pretty much if you know me at all, you know this to be true, because I am not shy in sharing the fact that I am constantly surprised with just how much work Jacob is.  Constantly.  I know that some of you may be reading this thinking, well what did she expect when she had a kid?  Just don't.  Stop right there, and get down from your high horse.  Sure, I had expectations of what it would be like, but not unrealistic ones in my mind.  I babysat plenty, was around kids a lot, and even took care of my younger brother and sister enough to have some pretty heavy experience with what children are capable of.  That being said, I don't think I was jaded when I thought about having kids.  But I was dead wrong when I thought about what it was going to be like to raise Jacob, what I was going to do or not do as a mother, and just how hard this whole parenting thing was going to be.  And I think from the people I have polled this last part seems to be universally true.  You don't know, until you know.  Right?

Jacob, in a nutshell, is busy.  Busy, busy, busy, busy, busy.  The cutest little busiest body I have ever seen.  And yes, I still have to remind myself to find the positive in his busy personality, because honestly, some days it is very tough.  And I also realize, that he works me like a field during harvest.  Sun up to sun down.  He works me.  He knows exactly where my breaking point is, and he takes it there, and much further.  When others babysit him, they give him such nice compliments.  "Oh, he was great.  We didn't have any problems.  He's so cute and sweet."  And I think, "Really?....  Really?"  This is reality.  I must embrace it.  I don't want to, but I must.  So let's just say, that on a typical day Jacob exhausts me.  He is everywhere, into everything, and could care less what I tell him.  He takes short naps and wakes up early in the morning.  He whines at the simplest of things, screams when he doesn't get his way, and is a daredevil to the max.  Now, force all these characteristics on a day when he doesn't feel good, and momma doesn't feel good.  Can we say disaster.  If my dad wasn't here today, I might have literally had smoke coming out my ears.

Here's a good example of just one little incident that sums up how today went.  I was sitting on the floor, trying to muster up the littlest bit of energy to play with Jacob.  He handed me the Xbox controller.  So, I pushed some buttons, rolled the joystick around a little, and handed it back to him.  Woah.  Wrong move.  The planets shifted and all the sudden we were out of orbit.  For what seemed like an eternity, Jacob thew his head back and screamed, rolled around on the carpet, shoved the controller at me several times, thew it at me a couple.  All the while, I am thinking 2 things.  1 - Ignore his tantrum, 2-What does he want?  Clearly I got it wrong the first time.  And if I could just figure it out, maybe I could make the horribly high pitched scream stop.  I finally figured out, after a very long time, that he wanted me to take the back off so he could practice putting the batteries in and out, and the back off and on.  Should have known.  However, he started to put a battery in his mouth, which ended his play time with those, which created a whole other ordeal.  Thus the cycle continued.  Sure we had moments of quiet.  Brief, fleeting moments. 

Now, positivity seekers:  If you decided to stick with me this long, it's gonna pay off.  This is where it gets good.

At the end of the day, after many cycles of meds and temperature checking, it was time for bed.  The house was a disaster and my body was fried.  But I knew if I could just muster up that last little bit of energy, I would have a break....at least for a little while.  After a bath and the struggle to get pajamas on, it was finally time for books and bedtime.  We read some books, and Jacob was calm.  He pointed and talked some.  He even smiled at me and touched my face a couple of times.  And then it happened.  The magic moment when you know why being a mom is just the best thing in the whole world.  We finished reading, and I said, "Time for night night."  Jacob turned towards me, and laid his head on my chest.  Then he looked up and puckered his lips to give me a kiss.  I kissed him, and he smiled.  He laid his head back down, and all was right in the world.  I rocked him and held him and thanked God for my precious baby.  I rocked him and cried, because I needed to be reminded that Jacob is precious, and fragile, and sweet.

Then I walked out into the disaster that is my house, and my work started all over.  As I was picking up, I thought, man I need to write about this.  And so I did.  And I shared it with you all.   

Weekend in Menlo

I have been horrible about updating my blog lately.  Someone (Sarah) reminded me the other day that I needed to get going!  Have I had time to update my blog lately?  Sure.  Have I done it?  No.  Instead of focusing on the past I will go with the most recent activities and update you on what's been going on 'round these parts.

This past weekend, Jacob and I journeyed out to Western Kansas.  Because I have recurring nightmares about being stuck in a car with screaming Jake, I broke down and bought an new dvd player for him to use on our trip.  (BTW, still haven't heard anything about my belongings turning up anywhere, and I'm guessing I won't hear anything.  I bet they have been sold on eBay for a pretty penny, so that some low life can buy things like neon lights for the underside of their car.)  Even having the dvd player, I still expected Jacob to be unhappy, preparing for the worst I guess.  He did great though!  He slept for a bit, and he watched his animal dvd which is now is favorite.  There was some yelling and whining, but overall the trip out was a success.

While out in the boonies, we were able to see my brother play basketball.  We went on Friday night, and although the varsity boys lost, it was a lot of fun.  We also visited my Aunt Lori, Uncle Tim, and cousin Caleb.  We played with their 15 new puppies.  At one point, Jacob fell down and was swarmed by 5 puppies.  He really didn't seem too phased by it, although after looking closely I realized one of them left a present on Jacob's leg.  So, we ventured into the house to change pants.  Sunday Natalie came over, and we all went out to Tanner's parents' farm to check out the cows.  Jacob really liked the cows.  He walked right up to the gate and even startled a few of them away from eating.  Monday we made a trip to Hays along with Aisha and Tanner.  We ate at Carlos O'Kelly's which I know Jonny would have loved.  Then we came home.

It is always good to be home after a trip, but we sure miss Aisha and Tanner.  I recently took a new job working part time for a middle/high school in Lindsborg, KS.  I have only been 2 days.  In fact, I would normally be there today, but because of weather I decided to stay home.  Currently the weather is doing nothing, so I feel slightly like an idiot for staying home, but better safe than sorry I guess.

Jacob is 15 months now, and really starting to show his personality.  The other day I said, "Let's get your coat on so we can go bye bye."  He looked at me, said, "no," then turned and walked away from me.  Well that was a first.  Good to see he is using his language skills, although I would have rather he said, "Mom, you're the best.  I love you."  Oh well, maybe next year. :)

3 Months Post Onset

It has been 3 months since Jonny left.  Does it feel like that long?  No.  It feels like much longer, like I am living my life in slow motion, like everything I do requires an uphill surge.  And once I make it to the top of the hill, it's just one more day done, and sleep brings me back down to the bottom of the hill again.  I do know that at some point, I will look back over the hills I tackled, and think, "wow, that wasn't so bad."  Kind of like having a baby.  In the thick of it you say, "Never, never, never again will I possibly put myself through so much pain."  Then you have momma's lapse, and you say, "hmmmm, that wasn't so bad.  I could totally do that again."  Well folks, I don't think, even if that happens, we will do this again, unless forced.  Jonny is making plans to divorce the Army.  And momma's quite happy about that.

So it's Friday night.  The song "Another Saturday night, and I ain't got nobody.  I got some money cuz I just got paid.  Oh how I wish I had someone to talk to.  I'm in an awful way," keeps coming to my mind.  Yes, I realize it's Friday.  I can't help what song pops in my head.  I baked an apple pie tonight.  Now that is a whole lotta fun for one Friday night you might say.  No, no I think just the right amount.  It smells so good.  I will have me a piece once finished updating my blog.

Jacob has been such a stinker lately, but an oh so cute stinker.  He is climbing and throwing and headbutting his way into the terrible twos.  Every morning I say, now let's not skip ahead son...save some for daddy. :)  He has been repeating things like crazy.  I say a word, he repeats it.  It is stinkin' cute.  And he gives me hugs.  Just out of the blue, he comes up and hugs me, with his hands around my back.  I can feel his little hands patting me on the back when he does it too.  Goodness kids know how to melt your heart....and then headbutt your nose so hard you have to check for bleeding.

Tonight I felt like I was on the funny farm while I was cooking supper.  I cut my finger, dropped crescent roll dough into the barbecue sauce, let a pan overflow all over the stove top, and managed to break a can opener that I payed $20 for just the other day.  All the while, Jacob is screaming at the kitchen gate because he's hungry "aaaaaaaahhhhh, ah, ah, eeeeeeeee."  And he throws things over the gate at me when he is mad too.  Where's Ashton when you need him.....

The new way to eat an orange.  I mean, who wants sticky hands?

I love brushing my teeth.

Me and Mama

Emergency Room

I had to take Jacob to the emergency room today, because he fell into the front door and busted open his lip.  Although he falls multiple times every day, this is the first time he was seriously injured.  After he fell, I scooped him up, and immediately went for paper towels to stop the bleeding.  I couldn't tell what exactly was bleeding at first, but it was outside and inside his mouth.  And there was a lot.  Once I realized he had a cut on his lip, I called my grandma who promptly came over to pick us up.  His lip stopped bleeding, and I wondered if I needed to take him in, but better safe than sorry I guess.  So, we road first class in my grandma's Cadillac to the emergency room.  By the way, we went to the new hospital in G.B., and I was quite impressed.  The nurse and doctor took a look at him and told me it wasn't in a place they usually liked to put stitches and that it would heal well on its own.  They didn't even check me in, just told me to have a nice day, and I was on my way.

This past weekend I made a trip out to see my family in Western Kansas...not the funnest place to be, but there was great company.  Right before I left, someone stole some possessions from my car, including a dvd player and an ipod.  I use the dvd player for Jacob, so he is entertained on the trip.  Needless to say, I could have used that dvd player on the 2 1/2 hour trip.  He cried a lot, and also threw everything on the floor I tried to give him.  Well, I can't pick things up while I'm driving, so most the time, he just cried.  It ended up being a great trip.  Even though I lost some expensive items, you might still be able to say that I am up, since a trip to the emergency room would have cost more than the possessions. 

Jonny is doing well, although he is really busy.  Really, really busy actually.  We were able to skype on Christmas, which was wonderful.  And he was able to call me on New Year's Eve.  Hopefully these next months will fly by.  I made about 30 resolutions this year, not kidding.  My sister and I came up with categories, and resolutions for each category.  Oh yeah, it was a big deal.  Now they are hanging on colored note cards in my room.  I will let you know that one of them is to update this blog, which, as you can see with your very own eyes, is at least 1 out of 30 resolutions that I have indeed completed.....at least for now.

Happy New Year!  Jonny comes home this year!

Here is a picture of Jacob's fat lip.  The cut goes all the way underneath, and you can see marks on this inside which is where he bit down.  I tried to clean around his mouth, but he wouldn't hold still.